Anyone got a spare left foot?

Ouchy ouch ouch. Running is bad for your health. And bad for your ankles and feet. And especially the left ankle and foot. Ouch.
You might remember that I twisted my ankle a while ago (the whole run a mile, slip over, twist ankle, hobble back to car, no car key, limp back to site of injury, still no key, stumble back to car and ring for help saga) and it's still not right. I thought it was better but every time I do a long run, my foot and ankle are really sore. Bottoms. (Other less polite swear words are available- feel free to insert your own).
Yesterday I ran 16 miles which is further than I ever thought I could. Sadly it's still a whopping 10miles off what I have to run in 4 weeks time (FOUR WEEKS!!! Cue slightly maniacal laughter bordering on hysteria). It involved more listening to the dulcet Wolverhampton tones of Caitlin Moran discussing rude stuff (boobies and the power of a good bra this time) and an awful lot of the canal, River Trent, Attenborough Nature Reserve and the visitor centre (emergency wee stop!). It also involved a lot of pain. My left foot arch and ankle started hurting at about mile 8 and haven't stopped aching since despite ibuprofen and a lot of whinging. I've also managed to start a new trend in bubblewrap-esque feet with my increasing blister burden. I was tempted to take a photo of the grossness for the blog but Matt suggested I should use it as a threat for if I don't receive enough sponsors. So, if you want to avoid having to view my revolting feet with lumpy, swollen blobs, pressure point hard skin and a little toenail that's threatening to leave me, you'd better sponsor me!
http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/longrunlizzy

Something that I hadn't anticipated about long distance running is the way it allows your mind to wander and think. Dangerous. Now you might expect, given that I'm allegedly a reasonably well educated woman who holds down a sensible job as a trainee surgeon and engages her brain in additional musical extra-curricular activities, that all this time to think would have produced something of worth, of significance, of depth.
Nope.
All I could think about yesterday was other modes of transport that I could see passing me by that beat running. The following transportation modes were noted:
- motorbility scooter (I've often thought of hijacking passing electric wheelchairs whilst out running)
- bike (although does require physical effort so a tough call)
- narrow boat (complete with kitchen and therefore, cake)
- horse (looks romantic but carries risk of falling and trampling to death- less favourable)
- rowing boat (appealing but suspect harder than it looks)
- canoe (saw 7 of these with young teenagers having a right laugh- fancied a go)
- scooter (do they do adult size ones?)
- large dog (not sure it was large enough to carry my big bottom but I was getting desperate)
- mythically large, flying swan (admittedly didn't actually see one of these but the thought crossed my mind)
- pushchair (yeah they're made for toddlers but I was in so much pain my gait resembled a toddler learning to run)

So you see, too much time to think is a bad thing. And when I try to focus on why I'm doing this marathon, I get all emotional and start to cry. Useless.

Tuesday was a day of training horror with the (not unexpected in retrospect) realisation that curry is a bad thing to eat the night before a long run. I'm not sure I need to expand on this point any further. Lesson learnt. (If you are clueless as to what I'm writing about, google "Joggers trots". It's not an equestrian event.)

Thursday saw me have a rubbish run of less than 4 miles and it felt like such hard work. I wanted to walk all the time and found it so hard to keep motivated. I felt exhausted, achy and fed up. Still am really! Came home and burst into tears about all this stupid running and really hit a low point. I just felt like it was too big a mountain to climb and I was stupid for even thinking I could do it. I also felt (and still do actually) that I'm going to let you all down. So many of you have been so generous already and so supportive and I'm so, so worried that I'm going to bottle it on the day and walk half of it and finish in a really rubbish time. I know I'm not the speediest runner but this could realistically take me 7 hours if I walk a large proportion. So, I'm going to apologise now if I let you down. I really will be so upset and disappointed in myself.

Which brings me on to my next point.

I expect that there's a significant proportion of you who don't choose to go in for religion in any form or maybe have a faith other than Christianity so if you're this category, then please don't be offended by this but maybe you can just continue to support me with positive thoughts and the knowledge of that will be a comfort to me.

Equally, I know that many of you who read this are (rightfully in my opinion!) big believers in prayer and God honouring and answering those heartfelt prayers. I'm struggling with believing I can do this marathon. It hurts. It's hard. I'd really rather not drag myself out for any more long runs or even any short ones. Whilst I was running on Saturday, I was thinking about God and what he must make of it all. Whether he's bothered? Whether it matters? In comparison to all the horrors, atrocities and hurt in our world, my lame efforts to run a marathon because our mate died and the fact my foot is sore is so trivial. So meaningless and minor. But, we talk in church about our "Father God" and as a parent, I want Katherine to grow up always being able to share her troubles and concerns with me, no matter how small or insignificant. I think God feels the same way. Yes, he sees the bigger picture and can put everything in context, but he also cares about our personal hurts and struggles. Part of being a Christian is upholding others in prayer. Another aspect of being a part of a church is being humble enough to ask for help when it's needed and not struggling on alone- because we don't have to. So, I'm going to add myself to my prayer list for a while and I'd be grateful if you could add me to yours. Pray for my foot- that it recovers quickly and doesn't give up on me before or during the marathon. Pray that I have the motivation to carry on training over the next 4 weeks. Pray that I might even start to enjoy it (yes, I believe in a God of miracles!!!). Next Saturday is due to include a 18-19 mile effort which will take me at least 3.5 hours and I'm sure I'll need your prayers then. If you don't normally pray or think it's all barmy, then just humour me and give it a go. You've not got anything to lose.
Verz would have agreed.

Next time: Memories of Mark - please email me at elizabeth.elsey@nhs.net or inbox me on facebook with your favourite Verz memories and I'll put them together for us all to smile at. Deadline= Sunday 6pm!